Self-Holding
Materials Needed
Feeling
Lonely
How to Do It
Lie down in a comfortable position, bringing your knees to your chest as if you were curling up into a ball. Wrap your arms around your knees, giving yourself a gentle, comforting squeeze. Focus on the feeling of being held and supported, even if it’s by yourself. Breathe deeply and slowly, allowing each breath to bring a sense of safety and connection.
Why It Works
Self-holding provides a physical sensation of comfort and security, mimicking the feeling of being held by someone else. This can help to soothe the feelings of loneliness by providing a tangible sense of care and self-compassion.
Guided Practice
Find a quiet place where you can sit or lie comfortably, and softly close your eyes. Take a few slow, deep breaths, feeling your body begin to relax with each exhale. Bring your awareness to the sensations of your body - the rise and fall of your chest, the weight of your limbs, the support of the ground beneath you. With each breath, imagine a sense of comfort and safety wrapping around you, like a warm, protective blanket. Allow yourself to feel held in this moment, safe and supported.
Settle further into your seat, allowing each breath to soften your body and bring calm to your mind. Wrap your arms around yourself, giving yourself a gentle, supportive hug. Feel the warmth and pressure of your own embrace, noticing how it feels to hold yourself with care and compassion.
As you continue to breathe deeply, imagine that with each inhale, you are drawing in feelings of love, comfort, and safety. Feel these sensations spreading through your body, like a gentle wave of warmth. Stay with these sensations, allowing your embrace to deepen your connection to yourself. Imagine that with each exhale, you are releasing any feelings of loneliness, fear, or discomfort, letting them melt away in your self-holding.
Visualize this self-holding as a protective cocoon, a space where you are safe to feel and express whatever is present. Notice if any feelings, thoughts, or images arise — perhaps a sense of comfort, a feeling of being nurtured, or even a memory of being held by someone you love. Allow these experiences to deepen your practice, connecting you more fully to your own capacity for self-compassion and self-care.
When you feel ready, gently release your arms, taking a few more deep breaths to ground yourself in the present moment. Notice how your body feels now — perhaps more at ease, more connected, or simply more peaceful. Gently open your eyes, carrying this sense of self-compassion and care with you into your day, feeling more attuned to your own needs and emotions.